Nov 16: I’m coming up to the end of my time at the workaway I’d been writing from. The German girls I mentioned in the last post already left. I’m not entirely certain why they chose to opt out early, but I suspect the experience being offered here wasn’t what they were wanting. Being so young, chances are they were looking for something a little more exciting, and this place is very low key and chill. That’s actually something I’ve enjoyed about it. But I’ll admit I’m about ready for a change of pace as well.
It was nice having the added presence of the girls here, and their loveliness was absolutely appreciated, but more often than not everyone would just wind up speaking German, and since my tongue does not come equipped with that language, I often felt somewhat left out. I completely understood why the conversational flow would veer that way so often, as one of the girls clearly wasn’t all that comfortable speaking English and the host’s mother doesn’t speak it at all, so from a democratic point of view, German did make the most sense. I wouldn’t necessarily say it bothered me all that much, but it did touch on my difficulties with communication somewhat.
It’s funny how the universe almost seems to conspire in placing us in situations where are weak spots are challenged. I sometimes wonder if that specifically happens just to test us, affording us an opportunity to measure where we’re at with our inner resolve.
About ten years ago I decided to do a cross Canada hitchhike, simply as a kind of challenge to myself. I could fill numerous blog posts with that experience, but for now I only want to touch in on one aspect of it. Perhaps I’ll weave more of that story throughout this blog project. For those who don’t know, there’s one section of the country, Quebec, where French is the primary language, and since I’m deficient in effectively all languages except English, that part of the journey had some added challenges to it. Especially when I would get picked up by someone who didn’t really speak English. I gotta say, despite all of that, I made my way through Quebec remarkably smooth and easy. The vast majority of people I came across were incredibly helpful, a few folks being so kind as to offer me places to stay while I was in Montreal and Quebec city. Both are fantastic cities, by the way. Real highlights of the trip.
But back to what I’m trying to actually get at here. I did a work trade on a farm northwest of Montreal that involved about two dozen people and for the vast majority of the time everyone there spoke French, despite being able to speak English. Some of the more considerate folks would make it a point to speak English at time to keep me involved (much like the host of my current workaway did while the girls were here), but that made up a pretty small percentage of communication time. I was much more self-conscious about the linguistic discrepancy in that situation compared to this more recent one, so I suppose it goes to show growth on my part. And that touches in on what I meant by the universe conspiring to create situations that test us.
As I said previously, overcoming obstacles requires engagement with those challenges, so you can retrain your energetic flow to dispel the negative effect it holds over you. See, I don’t really believe in random chance, but rather in an unfathomably complex system of energetic cause and effect working to maintain an immeasurable equilibrium. Everything that happens is the result of the way the collective field of energy was effected by any given choice or action. I think the tendency to see events as random is the result of ignorance- and I don’t mean to evoke that word in a judgemental sort of way, but rather in the sense that we literally just can’t see all the nuances of cause and effect taking place in our lives and in life as a greater whole.
We also tend towards two other patterns of behavior that veer us away from viewing life processes in this way. One, we like to think we’re in control of our lives, or at least that we could be in control. And two, I think we tend to want to avoid taking full responsibility for ourselves. Both of these behaviors correlate to left brain/egoistic functions, and the capacity to recognize a greater holistic operation of unavoidable cause and effect is more so the function of the right brain, something our current cultural orientation is in heavy resistance towards- to our own personal and collective detriment.
No matter how badly you may wish to believe it, the reality of life’s operations won’t change just because you think something different. That’s pretty much the foundation of superstitious thinking, and despite our insistence that science is ridding us of superstitious thought, I’d argue that it’s only cultivating a different flavor of it.
Anyways, I’m going off on a side tangent here- but I suppose that’s part of the intention behind this blog, to simply let my mind run free and without tight constraint, so expect this rambly type of arrangement to be the norm. I do have some more tightly curated things I plan on plaiting through this online space, but the majority is just gonna be my mind running without a leash.
My point is, I think it’s better to recognize that triggering situations are most likely emerging to provide you with an opportunity to free your energetic system from a negative thought/emotion leech, and due to the inescapable and universal nature of energetic cause and effect, you’ll attract this shit to you whether you like it or not. That is unless you want to bury yourself away inside of a tiny box both internally and externally, which does seem to be a growing orientation for a lot of folks.
(Editor Aodhan here: There’s a whole lot of yous in that previous paragraph that could come across as fairly accusatory. They’re really meant to be mes and Is, as I’m primarily preaching to myself, but that doesn’t flow quite as well in the rhythms of wordcraft.)
Personally speaking, I’ve tried to wrap myself up in the seemingly comfy cloak of victimization plenty of times in the past and I would say doing so provided me with a full zero of good. More and more I find that looking for wherever I am contributing to the dissonances and dysfunctions in my life, and actually acting accordingly in attempting to resolve them head on, has been far more beneficial in freeing me from negativity and cultivating a much more functional version of myself. Such a view is central to all the mystical, esoteric traditions and I very much believe it. It doesn’t makes problems go away, and it isn’t always easy to maintain that mental state, but it does make those problems far more manageable whenever you succeed at managing your mind that way. For anyone who genuinely wants to feel more empowered, there’s a solid step to take.
Okay, that’s enough preaching. I’m gonna end this post by mentioning something really nice and thoughtful that the host here gave me as a gift. It’s a bracelet he made, braiding the strap himself out of a kind of durable cord, that has a small compass, a whistle and a piece of flint all in the clip. It’s something of a protective talisman and an incredibly thoughtful item to have given me. You never really know the kind of effect you can have on people simply by being sincere, open and welcoming with your presence, but I think I may have achieved something along those lines here. Hope you’re all having a good day.
ACMindworks 
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